Why I Love Getting Healthy

Singaporeans may have missed sitting down at hawker centers and eating their plate of Char Siew Rice ({fork burn or roast} pork rice in English or Nasi Babi Panggang in Malay), but we still have our dining table ala Mahjong Table and the squat-on-the-floor style of floor.

Shut up, Zee. What do you know? For more than two weeks now, he’s been Circuit Breakered. After the first five minutes of the Belarus – Reserve League match, he complained that he is fat, slow, clumsy, had lost his Zinedine Zidane touch, and had missed cheering Hougang's latest Kyrgyzstani international player. What he didn’t mention was that he had climbed up 14 floors of horrifying staircases three times in his own time and that the push-ups he had mustered had started to cause pain on his chest.

The truth is that Zee probably has eaten more than his share of the Nasi B…Briyani, he is somewhat obese, he can be slow, and he does sometimes display the touch and intelligence of a politician. But it’s always been that way with Zee. And you know what else? Over 10 pm, when he puts his mind to it, he’s still thinking of supper.

I love being healthy. Not everything about healthiness. Always have a tad of unhealthy. My non-existent weight problem, my issue with gout, my stubbornness, my sometimes timeserving, my winsome smile, my wife who did the breadwinning, my genius but atrabilious attitude, my feint, my inability to be a different race even when I have a certificate to state I can speak in that race language, and all those seemingly moniker I have collected over the years in primary school, secondary school and polytechnic.

And you know what? Ancestral-minded, lip-pursing, colonial complex mentality can’t cope with it. They can’t deal with the fact that despite all the healthy eating advisory they conformed, even though they kept off the chocolate bars and the cakes and the beer, they will never be ready for a non-conformist mindset.

For the first few days in the Circuit Breaker there has been a concerted appeal by the authorities to enforce the usage of masks for all workers who sell or prepare food. We were told that Singapore hospitals would suffer if leaders wore masks; and that it would cause panic. Autosomal Dominant Compelling Helioophthalmic Outburst Syndrome (Achoo). Excuse me.

There have been many delicious keto meals for me in this Circuit Breaker – Keto hamburger patties with creamy tomato sauce and fried cabbage, the keto bread, three-cheese keto frittata, classic bacon and eggs, europixhd.io, Keto pizza, and Keto mushroom omelet. But nothing will give me as much pleasure as the total annihilation of the wuhan virus. Not only did it take away the lives of many loved ones, but it also whistled – the end of football matches all over the country, the region, and the globe. And yesterday Singapore registered a high number of wuhan virus victims.

The thing that my smartarse friends and I don’t get is that why wasn’t there a call to wear the masks earlier? Yes, it’s frustrating knowing that you have an expert in one particular field, but he wasn’t made to be the man-in-charge to lead the fight against the wuhan virus. But that is what makes our country so much more unique than the majority of countries, a started-from-a-socialist one party forever.

Anyway, the outro at the end of this pandemic is up to anyone’s guessing. I acknowledged that this pestilence had improved the finer things in nature and celebrated the need for staying healthy. "We've had Middle East Respiratory Syndrome (MERS), and now we've got the wuhan virus." Shut up, Zee, you suck.

So who aspires to be healthy? Exactly. We didn’t even want to be contacted by the wuhan virus, but it came. But hey, that’s a different matter. For many of us, staying healthy is the ultimate role model. Why? Because we look at unhealthy, all of us who are genuinely obese and over the limit, and think if others can be healthy, then there is hope for us. Mask please, thanks.

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